The Holidays in Survival Mode: How to Care for Yourself While Supporting Your Autistic Child

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The Holidays in Survival Mode: How to Care for Yourself While Supporting Your Autistic Child

I have to admit, I struggle each holiday season. While, on paper, the wacky clothes days at school, holiday get togethers and family outings, seem like fun, the reality is they’re incredibly dysregulating for my autistic child and our family.

Each December is a month of meltdowns, irregular sleeping patterns, and early pickups from school (from more meltdowns). The change in routine, that took months to establish, causes chaos not fun.

I know I’m not alone in carrying a heavy emotional load over the holiday season.

So, what can be done to not only support our kids, but also make sure we, as caregivers, don’t fall apart along the way?

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Blame is Easy. Supporting Moms is Harder (and More Important)

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Blame is Easy. Supporting Moms is Harder (and More Important)

When I was pregnant, I followed all the rules. I didn’t eat soft cheeses, sushi, luncheon meat, limited my caffeine intake, and more. 

My first pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage – which of course I blamed myself for. I doubled down on following the rules for subsequent pregnancies, wanting to do everything “right.” The result: two babies and one more miscarriage.

Even when you follow the rules, the outcomes can be different from your expectations.

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Late Again? Why Mornings with a Neurodivergent Child Are Anything But Routine

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Late Again? Why Mornings with a Neurodivergent Child Are Anything But Routine

For way too many years, I’ve stressed about getting my child to school on time. I felt this huge burden to watch the clock, get out the door at a certain time and arrive at school before the morning bell. 

While this is a struggle for many parents and caregivers, for those of us raising kids with anxiety, ADHD, autism and other disabilities, it can be a Herculean task. While yes, we do have unicorn days when the stars align and we make it to school on time, too often we have to navigate many stressors to get out the door.

If you can relate to what I’m saying, read on. If you’re shaking your head thinking that’s all children, definitely read on as I’m about to pull back the curtain of a typical morning in my household and why getting to school on time is such a challenge.

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Why I’m Embracing a Structure Free Summer for My Child

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Why I’m Embracing a Structure Free Summer for My Child

We’ve finally made it to the end of the school year with two months of summer ahead of us. While some parents rush to sign their kids up for camps, activities and outings to fill the days, I’m embracing the free space. 

As mom of an autistic child, the school year is tough! It’s full of hurdles to navigate from sun up to sundown.

By the time summer rolls around we’re all emotionally and physically exhausted. There’s no mental capacity left to schedule more activities.

Embracing a structure free summer gives us all the break we so desperately need.

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Decades Later, the Fight for Educational Supports for Kids with Disabilities Remains Unchanged

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Decades Later, the Fight for Educational Supports for Kids with Disabilities Remains Unchanged

This summer, I spent time cleaning out my parents’ basement. Having lived in the same house for over 50 years, it was a treasure trove of old magazines, family photos, expired foods, vases and so much more.

One of the interesting things I came across in my purging was a binder from the 1980s about my brother. I know many parents and caregivers of kids with disabilities are familiar with this binder (I have a few in my house). It’s a summary of letters to the school, medical and therapy reports, assessments, and report cards.

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Why Family Can be the Most Challenging Advocacy Conversations

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Why Family Can be the Most Challenging Advocacy Conversations

Over the last month, I’ve delivered a number of workshops on How to Share Your Story and Advocate for Change. In discussions with participants about advocacy challenges a common theme has emerged – conversations with family members.

While you’d hope that family members would be non-judgemental and supportive of individuals with disabilities, sadly this isn’t always the case. They can be the harshest critics.

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How Your Parent Expertise Can Help Teachers

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How Your Parent Expertise Can Help Teachers

When my child was first diagnosed with ADHD, I was completely overwhelmed. I wasn’t sure how to help him or what resources were available. As additional diagnoses were added to the list, I decided it was time to get educated.

Simply put – I’ve become a semi-expert on my son (acknowledging he’s the true expert).

This means I often (if not always) know how to motivate and support my son more than his teachers, support staff or other family members.

Armed with all this knowledge, I encourage you to share your learnings with your child’s teachers.

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Autism Acceptance Month: Shining a Light on the True Cost of Neglect

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Autism Acceptance Month: Shining a Light on the True Cost of Neglect

April is Autism Awareness Acceptance Month. It’s a month where organizations and individuals try to raise the profile of autism, highlighting the successes of many incredible people. With 1 in 29 children in British Columbia having been formally diagnosed with autism, chances are you know an autistic individual.

While there’s lots of talk about autism acceptance, sadly governments and employers have taken little action to truly support these individuals so they can lead their best lives.

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5 Ways to Encourage Self-Advocacy in Kids

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5 Ways to Encourage Self-Advocacy in Kids

When children are young, as parents and caregivers we tend to be their voice. But as our kids grow and have opinions of their own, we make the shift from being their voice to their megaphone to their cheerleader.

What this shift looks like and when it happens depends on the individual. What is important is we encourage self-advocacy in kids, regardless of their ability. This is not only an important life skill, but also essential to having personal safety and fulfillment.

 

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Volunteer With Passion, Not Obligation, to Make a Difference

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Volunteer With Passion, Not Obligation, to Make a Difference

As a responsible member of the community, there’s no getting around volunteering out of obligation. But when looking at how you spend the majority of your volunteer hours, and where you want to make a true difference, you need to ensure you’re volunteering with passion not obligation.

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