Curiosity Comes at a Cost: The Hidden Exhaustion of Being a Service Dog Handler

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Curiosity Comes at a Cost: The Hidden Exhaustion of Being a Service Dog Handler

For the last few weeks, I’ve been caring for my child’s service dog while they’re in hospital. I’ve taken over the handler duties – taking him for walks, having him stay with me at a home for families near the hospital and bringing him to visit her each day (with his service dog vest on).

What I’ve discovered is the significant amount of public interest, and even interference, service handlers face each and every time they leave the house. It is exhausting!

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Why Talking About Mental Health is Easier Than Supporting It

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Why Talking About Mental Health is Easier Than Supporting It

For all the talk about supporting mental health, the reality is that the on the ground resources are lacking as are the emotional supports for individuals and families who are struggling.

Sadly, this is a truth that I’ve learned over and over again trying to navigate mental health challenges as a parent of child who is struggling.

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Embrace the Messy: Why Growth Rarely Happens in Your Comfort Zone

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Embrace the Messy: Why Growth Rarely Happens in Your Comfort Zone

I was recently on a call where one of the women said – “I’ve learned to embrace the messy.” She shared that by letting go of perfection and trying to control her environment, she was able to see how the messy was a key part of gaining clarity.

I’ve spent many days reflecting on that simple comment – embrace the messy.

Let’s face it, none of us live Instagram perfect lives. While we tend to only share the picture-perfect moments, there’s a lot of mess happening behind the scenes. And it’s the mess that helps us truly appreciate and get to the moments of clarity.

When I look back on my life and career, all the big breakthroughs, aha moments or times of growth have come out of the messy.

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Graduation Should Celebrate Every Student—Not Just the Popular Ones

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Graduation Should Celebrate Every Student—Not Just the Popular Ones

June marks not only the end of the school year, but also graduation season. It’s a busy month filled with elementary and high school graduation ceremonies, proms and other activities aimed at helping students celebrate the completion of an important milestone in their educational journey. 

Like many parents and caregivers of graduating students, I sat through my share of speeches at awards day, graduation day and prom. Speeches from students, parents and teachers reflecting on the students’ time at the school, touching on highlights, reminiscing about the past and pontificating about the future.

As I sat and listened, something became apparently clear. The experience that many of the speakers talked about was the experience of a select group of students. The “in” crowd and jocks.

The stories of the collective journey were not stories of events or activities that included all students.

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When Exclusion Becomes Normal: Why Schools Must Do More for Students with Disabilities

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When Exclusion Becomes Normal: Why Schools Must Do More for Students with Disabilities

Do you ever have conversations that haunt you? Where you play what the other person said on a loop in your mind, to the point it becomes a sore you can’t stop picking?

I recently had one of those conversations. A conversation where the person made a flippant remark that hit me hard. A conversation where I wished I had called out the comment instead of letting its audacity blindside me.

The conversation was about a high school student and the subtle, and not so subtle, ways they have been bullied and excluded by their classmates over the years. Going beyond the name calling and talking about this student behind their back, they’ve also had students throw garbage on them and film them during a medical episode, accuse them of faking their disability (which includes the use of a wheelchair), locking them in a classroom, and more.

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Who’s Caring for the Caregivers?

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Who’s Caring for the Caregivers?

As I navigate my turbulent journey, of those in my life who are aware of what’s happening, one three people have asked me how I’m doing – truly doing. None of which are family members (besides my spouse who’s also on this rollercoaster). 

While many of these people would be quick to say – let me know if you need anything – their silence indicates otherwise.  

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Burning Bridges or Building Change? Why Effective Advocacy Takes Time

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Burning Bridges or Building Change? Why Effective Advocacy Takes Time

Many of us get into advocacy because of necessity, not choice. Very few of us have the option of dipping our toe into the advocacy journey. Rather, we’re forced to jump fully in to advocate for ourselves or a loved one.

While urgency is often the force behind advocacy, it’s important to remember that advocacy is a long-term game, not about short-term wins.

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The Holidays in Survival Mode: How to Care for Yourself While Supporting Your Autistic Child

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The Holidays in Survival Mode: How to Care for Yourself While Supporting Your Autistic Child

I have to admit, I struggle each holiday season. While, on paper, the wacky clothes days at school, holiday get togethers and family outings, seem like fun, the reality is they’re incredibly dysregulating for my autistic child and our family.

Each December is a month of meltdowns, irregular sleeping patterns, and early pickups from school (from more meltdowns). The change in routine, that took months to establish, causes chaos not fun.

I know I’m not alone in carrying a heavy emotional load over the holiday season.

So, what can be done to not only support our kids, but also make sure we, as caregivers, don’t fall apart along the way?

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Blame is Easy. Supporting Moms is Harder (and More Important)

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Blame is Easy. Supporting Moms is Harder (and More Important)

When I was pregnant, I followed all the rules. I didn’t eat soft cheeses, sushi, luncheon meat, limited my caffeine intake, and more. 

My first pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage – which of course I blamed myself for. I doubled down on following the rules for subsequent pregnancies, wanting to do everything “right.” The result: two babies and one more miscarriage.

Even when you follow the rules, the outcomes can be different from your expectations.

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Late Again? Why Mornings with a Neurodivergent Child Are Anything But Routine

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Late Again? Why Mornings with a Neurodivergent Child Are Anything But Routine

For way too many years, I’ve stressed about getting my child to school on time. I felt this huge burden to watch the clock, get out the door at a certain time and arrive at school before the morning bell. 

While this is a struggle for many parents and caregivers, for those of us raising kids with anxiety, ADHD, autism and other disabilities, it can be a Herculean task. While yes, we do have unicorn days when the stars align and we make it to school on time, too often we have to navigate many stressors to get out the door.

If you can relate to what I’m saying, read on. If you’re shaking your head thinking that’s all children, definitely read on as I’m about to pull back the curtain of a typical morning in my household and why getting to school on time is such a challenge.

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